I sat and waited in the tiny, airless room. They told me to sit in here and that someone would be back to get things started. So, I waited.

Just a table, a few chairs, and a dark mirror. 

Calm your mind, slow it down. I remembered that this was a good idea and sure enough, it proved to be. I could feel myself breathing again, finding some reassurance that everything would be ok. My heart throbbed a bit more softly now.

And I thought about him. How much I would miss him. Not one to be nostalgic, this surprised me in that moment. Live in the present, I always said to anyone who would listen. It’s all about the here and now. I don’t need anything from the past to guide me up ahead. The past can only cloud your vision. I was certain of this.

But there, in the little room, I remembered. I remembered his promise and potential. How his parents said he would amount to something someday. And I believed it. Every word of it.

Man, I was going to miss him. So much. His confidence, his ability to find the good in every situation. That always lifted my spirits. But now, he was gone. And forever.

Just then the door opened and a short man entered and dropped into the one remaining chair. 

He spoke. “Ok, this is what’s going to happen next. First, I am going to ask you a number of simple questions. Then I’m going to take you down the hall to get your picture taken. After that, you are going to be given some clothing to put on and you will relinquish all of your own clothing and personal belongings. All of this will be given back to you upon your release, unless it’s contraband. After that, we are going get your fingerprint and a full body search will be conducted. There’s going to be some paperwork next and then someone will come in to do a health screening. Then you will be brought to another location outside of this building, pending determination of bail. Does all that make sense to you?”

I heard this, the machine gun litany, and could feel myself elevating again. My heart was pushing up against me more and more now, I could hear it clearly, and offered dimly: “Yes, it makes sense.”

“Ok, I will be back in a few minutes to begin the questions.” With that, the short man departed. I could hear the door lock behind him.

I must calm myself, I immediately thought. It will be ok, I know it.

Then, noticing the blood streaks across the front of my powder white Brooks Brothers dress shirt, I looked up at the dark mirror, seeing my own faint reflection there staring back and completely alone, and said, this time out loud, “I am going to miss you so much.”